-visit Haw Par Villa(?!)
-jamming!!
-tour around Singapore ;p (+ taking Singapore Flyer)
-slumber pary :D
-learn salsa
-zoo/bird park (?)
-group picnic (:
-mastering the art of baking cupcakes! :DDD
-trekking
-bird watching ???
Now that the world isnt ending, its love that im sending to you. It isnt the love of a hero, and thats why I fear it wont do.
all you gotta do, is listen.
-Aum Krushchev- - cause yknow, sometimes some things get too hard to handle. you feel crushed,, but you're still standing up straight. you feel lost, but you're still somewhere on the right path. you feel lonely, but you have amazing friends around you. you feel stupid, but its not like you keep failing though. (okay, well, yes, my fails are usually the extreme ones, like f9) you feel dejected, but you're working hard/harder. you feel all out of love, but...(okay, there's no buts to this. not like im even in love in the first place anw) you feel like crying, but you have no reason to. you feel so down, but you laughed a hell lot today.
if all that can sum up my day for today, i have nth else to say. i think, the confessions you find in this blog, is nowhere near 1/10 of all the secrets i have been keeping. (well, yes, if you ppl out there do read my posts regularly, you'll find alot of juicy info) im planning to let everything out on the last day, i guess. its scaring the shit out of me how this world's revolving. as much as i love crescent, i suddenly felt like just disappearing, gone without a trace.
-Clover Munchy-
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6:05 AM
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
"even if the whole world is against you, i'll always be here (:"
i rmb, that same exact sentence (yes, with the smiley too) even though that was like more than 2 years back. things that i miss, but i know they'll never come back. you're not coming back. how i wish you're here tonight to hold me tight again and give me that sense of comfort. i cant stop these tears, cause i miss you friend.
i dont usually say this, but i rly do miss pri sch life. this time, not the studies part.
i came across my pri sch choir file and yes, i realised its been so long since i last sing my heart out (properly). i could feel all the memories rushing back when i slowly sing each song. the kind of memories that will last forever.
& how i used to have an interest in breakdancing. how i USED to be able to do some of the stunts, back then in pri sch. but now, all gone. its congruent to a passion lost. lets rewind time.
and of course, i'll never forget netball. i loved netball and i still do love it now. dont ask me why im not in netball now (actually, glad im not in it too). i think, the last time i played a proper netball game, was 3 years back or so? i cant rmb. but shit, i rly do miss it. when i look back into my pri sch days, i still have vivid memories of the trainings, of the games, of the team.
and today in the bus, i overheard this other girl from our sch, saying this: "if you suddenly wake up with that feeling as though you're gonna fall but actually not, people say that you're feeling insecure"
now i know. so, im not surprised it always happens to me.
and like they say too, every good thing has a bad side to it.
like today.
-Aum Krushchev-
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6:41 AM
today started off bad. i dont know whether to feel relieved or scared now. last 6 papers, suck to the maxxxx!
emath: was horrid duh. but i can hardly rmb anth now, ahwell.
phys: the worst paper ever. sure-flunk paper. im upset, terribly terribly upset.
hist: it was um, okay i guess. but i didnt finish. ahh Krushchev me love.
mlyp2: it was okay, at least i know im not gonna get zero for peribahasa! haha thanks aqilah, the last min memorizing session with you worked. (oh, after i finished the paper, i was scribbling chem and amath stuff that i memorised at the back of the paper in pencil, and that chi teacher kept walking past and looking and staring. TSKK!)
chem: ooh, another horrid paper. my mind went like -BLANK- for the 2nd qn for part b. like totally -BLANK-
amath: oh yes, another sure fail paper. i didnt know whether to laugh or cry while doing it. asilah thinks we're retarded, cause me and raihan started laughing and being high when we saw the paper. LOL. (oh yeah, amira too!) - so yeah. horrible. urgh. oh, and lava told me bout my csp marks. she told me that i got the highest for compo, so yeah, cool :D but guess what i got, 27/50. haha wth, which means the rest must've either a.) just passed or b.) failed. lol. so funny i couldnt stop laughing. hahah, wait, not for the wrong reasons ah! but cool ah, i passed overall even though i didnt expect to.
OH YEAH. did i mention, we finally got a new fridge (0n sat!) haha try surviving a week without a fridge, its SUPER COOL (not.) but now my kitchen looks so weird, some parts are so um, futuristic-like and some are so country-like. ohamgee.
anws, today was neatly awesome. thanks liy and siti :D haha but shit, i spent like um, two days worth of pocket money on food. ON FOOD ONLY. tskk school makes me fatter, i realise. long theory but nvm.
so, today ended off good. coincidentally when i was reaching home, this is the way i live, started playing. what a good end to an almost perfect day dont cha think! :D (good because cts are over)
dont need to work hard, thats the way i feel. i feel that this is the way i live. (:
-Clover Munchy-
APPLES!
5:29 AM
Sunday, February 24, 2008
till the end of time
if you're smart enough to get what i mean.
im sorry
-Aum Krushchev-
(goodbye white-houses. ): thanks for being a short but lovely and sweet memory. love ya. muackzx)
APPLES!
7:00 AM
Saturday, February 23, 2008
Guess what song (: - Whoa oh oh Ooh hooh No No No
See, I dont know why I liked you so much I gave you all, of my trust I told you, I loved you, now thats all down the drain Ya put me through pain, I wanna let you know how I feel
Fuck what I said it dont mean shit now Fuck the presents might as well throw em out Fuck all those kisses, they didn't mean jack Fuck you, you hoe, I dont want you back Fuck what I said it dont mean shit now Fuck the presents might as well throw em out Fuck all those kisses they didn't mean jack Fuck you, you hoe, I dont want you back
You thought, you could Keep this shit from me, yeah Ya burnt bitch, I heard the story Ya played me, ya even gave him head Now ya askin for me back Ya just another act, look elsewhere Cause ya done with me
Fuck what I said it dont mean shit now Fuck the presents might as well throw em out Fuck all those kisses they didn't mean jack Fuck you, you hoe, I dont want you back Fuck what I said it dont mean shit now Fuck the presents might as well throw em out Fuck all those kisses they didn't mean jack Fuck you, you hoe, I dont want you back
Ya questioned, did I care You could ask anyone, I even said Ya were my great one Now its, over, but I do admit I'm sad. It hurts real bad, I cant sweat that, causeI loved a hoe
Fuck what I said it dont mean shit now Fuck the presents might as well throw em out Fuck all those kisses they didn't mean jack Fuck you, you hoe, I dont want you back
Oh oh Uh huh yeah Oh oh Uh huh yeah Oh oh Uh huh yeah Oh oh Uh huh yeah - i suddenly have a rekindled love for this song. addicted to it once agn.
-Aum Krushchev-
APPLES!
10:40 AM
even though there's no reason for me not to, i dont feel good now. at all. idk why. anws, i shall write bout my comments on the papers so far (=horrible) 6 down, 6 more to go. (i cant believe this, im only 1/2 way through!)
csp: the essay was crap. cause the title was like 我的兴趣。 and, i wrote that i wanna be a musician. amazing, amazing. (ok, it was part of the syllabus, i just wrote wtv crap i memorised) more of like, spending 1/2 my time flipping through the damned dictionary. paper 2 was quite very horrid. i didnt understand a single thing AT ALL for the close passage and the compre. till lava told me its smth bout mooncake festival. OH.
el: from el, i conclude that im a boring person. yes. cause mr ravi said for the 2 compre passages, 1 wil be narrative and nice while the other will be factual and boring. and i actually found the factual one more interesting than the narrative one. conclusion: yeah hell im a boring person.
mly(paper1): it was okay but not okay. okay cause the title was quite simple, smth we always do. BUT my points were very messy and screwed up, all over the place. dang.
ss: the paper was hmm not bad either. for once (in an exam), i finished the whole paper. just that. aft sch, met Ms. C. (?) and talked bout the paper. AND she said we're not supp to put a purpose para for qn 1a. damn it. goodbye 4 marks ):
bio: i think its like one of the easiest paper they ever set for an exam. was so relieved but not so. this time, idc i want a pass badly ):
lit: was errr. ohmyshiat i dont even know that passage even exist in the book okay. srsly. but managed to crap my way through and agn, finished the paper (finish=4 points+conclusion)
and this more to go: -emath (6 chaps!) -phys (8 chaps!) -hist (the whole of cold war. damnit) -mly paper2 (yeah those peribahasa-s) -chem (yeahh 3 topics only :D) -amath
ok. so thats it i guess. probability sucks i tell you. probably the one and only topic i hate in emath. yeah wait. i didnt get to say that i officially stopped disliking proving topics and im actually beginning to love love it (:
oh, i love amath classes too. sometimes for the wrong reasons. but haiyoh.
(ok dang i rmb i still have a dedication post to put up!)
OH. AND. i found out the sec2s are learning sec3 bio stuff. wah, the sch's rly scaring the shit out of me. if they dont do well for their math and science, i wont blame them. i understand, i totally understand. this world's getting so insane.
-Clover Munchy-
APPLES!
9:18 AM
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
one thing i noticed: love can make even the best people stumble
my day's just not good. im not kidding when i said i wanna go to the hospital. somehow weirdly strangely suits my emotions.
the stall vendors have smth against me today, idk why. go ask them.
and so, i told a white lie. forgive me.
school's so hectic, more than ever i guess. goes the same for life. im literally running around the house. madness.
-Clover Munchy-
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5:58 AM
Monday, February 18, 2008
hah hah i realised my previous post can be very misleading. hmm.
i tried finding for THE SONG throughout the whole of today. until i finally did find it. but i didnt know it'll be that song. yeah, im talking in alien language. so hard to express. cant help feeling guilty, feels like the blame is on me. and you could put the blame on me you could put the blame on me
我很压力了。 ):
on a lighter note, i got a B for chem. yeah seriously wasnt even expecting to pass. but i guess God helped me. ahh, syukur alhamdulillah (:
originally, it was supp to be, adelene. but then the name/spelling is quite common, so adeline it is. till i realised that there's someone in 4c3 with tt name, so changed it to adelina but i paused and looked at the name agn and agn. it looks wrong, so i took out the letter E and it became adlina okay, so i was happy with the name. till i realised like half a min later that adlina, nur adlina(sec2). ITS THE SAME SPELLING. just diff pronounciation. HAIYOH. so siti suggested it be adenaline but thats just adrenaline minus the letter R. then since we figured out names that sound anth like the ones mentioned above wont do, she suggested carrotia but also agn, it just seems like some country named Croatia (according to her) yeah. and cool, we've finally settled for Clover. so random, and not as girlish as we wanted, but its okay (: hey there Clover Munchy :D
-Aumn Khrushchev-
APPLES!
4:42 AM
Saturday, February 16, 2008
im not exactly in the best of health now. and i cant believe im actually feeling this way; im scared that i wont be able to come to sch on mon :0 yeah, insane. this is what sch does to you TSKTSK.
i feel like uploading random pics: dont ask me why she has fat legs and skinny arms. i think she's cute (LOLL p.d.s.!) cny. we're not the only bored ones. (-looks at background-) ice skating! though its kinda small. me and kiki :D labrador park at midnight. awesome. i cant help it LOL. everytime they mention "ammonia gas is liberated",, this image keeps appearing in my mind HOHO we were rly bored... so we started taking pics :D haha the little cute nerd with pink braces :DD (we did this during bio lol) raihan! liy's supposed hockey lookalike fries. i think it looks more of like a cartoon's leg (:
now i think that fire emergency drills are not that bad. 1.) waste time = phys test postponed :D 2.) we (amira, raihan, siti, me) had a little mini picnic in the middle of the field (: 3.) played childhood games. HEHE (teet teet teet, rumahsekolah terbakar panggil bomba, bomba datang berlumba-lumba. A for Awak, B for Budak, C for Cantik, Awak Budak Cantik! LOLL LOLL!) 4.) taking pics! 5.) singing along to song(s) in my phone :D 6.) chit chatting ((:
basically, it was good. (: too bad its our last one in crescent. cause we were planning to bring along mats and umbrellas and fans and more food along next time. :D
i just came across this pic. and i felt rly sad. though it has nth to do with me at all, its just so...sad(ok sorry for the lack of vocab) i could feel it, yes, i could feel it.
its so unfair for me. it was at the end. right at the end. how wasted.
i fell in love with a stranger. no kidding. throughout the whole train journey i have this urge to look at him. okay fine, i just rly like him. and its been like what...weeks? do take note that i dont like guys that easily (yes, im not les or bi, for that matter :0) and most guys dont rly impress me. so yeah, this guy must be that awesome (: (but i think he must be at least 3 yrs older than me. DANG IT)
-Pink&Black
(okay eew i realised i sound so weird haha like so mentel hohoho)
APPLES!
8:56 AM
Thursday, February 14, 2008
im not supp to be here now and i cant help feeling damn guilty. but then, i just have to do this HAPPY VALENTINES' DAY! (: yeah, i love each and every one of you to bits and pieces and lines and dots and atoms and molecules. really. (: thanks everyone, for making today extremely superb. (p.s. i lubxz mamee ripcurl, mamee pencils and mamee b.bong! :DD) dedication post up soon, i suppose (=after common tests) for now, i shall just dedicate a song for all you beloved ones :D
MARCOS HERNANDEZ LYRICS "The Way I Do"
Your kiss, your smile, your mind You're sunlight in my eyes I miss your breath on my neck When we whisper in the night
Didn't wanna want you Didn't wanna need you so bad Didn't wanna wake up And find that I was falling so fast Didn't wanna need you Didn't wanna need anyone Now look what you've done
Now I can't go on without you I'm naked, I cant fake it. I'm not that strong without you Never thought I could love you the way I do.
Your touch, your skin, can't believe the way you let me in Don't rush tonight, I need you like the ocean needs the tide.
Didn't wanna want you Didn't wanna need you so bad Didn't wanna wake up And find that I was falling so fast Didn't wanna need you Didn't wanna need anyone Now look what you've done
Now I can't go on without you I'm naked, I cant fake it. I'm not that strong without you Never thought I could love you the way I do.
I always thought I would stand on my own Climb a mountain top all alone Relying, depending on no one Now look at what you've done
Now I can't go on without you I'm naked, I cant fake it. I'm not that strong without you Never thought I could love you the way I do. Never thought I could love you Never thought I could need you Never thought I could want you The way I do Never thought I could love you Never thought I could need you Never thought I could want you The way I do I love you I need you I want you..the way I do - i mean this, in a friendship kinda way ((:
oh wait. let me add here. i didnt know i have such cute jnrs like hazwani and izzah. LOLL shant elaborate much here. it cracks me up whenever i recall the whole incident. HAHA
-Pink&Black
APPLES!
6:06 AM
Monday, February 11, 2008
Stop and stare I think I'm moving but I go nowhere Yeah I know that everyone gets scared But I've become what I can't be, oh Stop and stare You start to wonder why you're here not there And you'd give anything to get what's fair But fair ain't what you really need Oh, can you see what I see yeah. true, true. dont feel like updating today. or soon for that matter. im on a verge of a breakdown.
-Pink&Black
cause this yr's Valentines gonna last forever
APPLES!
6:47 AM
Friday, February 08, 2008
my love for you will never end, you'll always be a part of me. as long as time keeps on passing by, you'll always be my baby boy.
i realized, i cant talk to you cause its like a disease. one that comes as fast as it goes. but then, you know you're different from the rest. cause i can say, from the bottom of my heart noone can make me smile the way you do, whenever we talk, or whenever you say things that will make me laugh, or grin; you brighten up my day. this friendship between us, so pure and so true. you laugh at my secrets; i laugh back at yours. and i realised, we open up to each other. a lot. and i realised too, how comfortable i feel opening up to you. but again, it sucks. cause im here listening to you. fall for another. i told you too, bout another person. but you dont know, how this feeling for you remain all these while. while the one that im having for that other person now, i know it wont last. never will. not like yours at least. you're the only one, so far, who makes me cry alot. not tears of sorrow, but tears of laughter. and so, here i end my dedication for you. cause if you want me to, sure, i can go on and on for many pages. but the memories and the feelings you give me, its not one that can be measured. this world is too materialistic for us dont you think. "where's the world that doesn't care. maybe i could meet you there" i just wanna say here now, that you are, and always will be, my number one .
-Pink&Black
(As we chain smoke cigarettes without thinking, says: WALAO A---E AND A----A IS SO DIFFERENT PLEASE As we chain smoke cigarettes without thinking, says: WHO CAME UP WITH THE NICKNAME HAHA TOOT FACE . . . but dont think i've forgiven you for that, tooface :/ )
APPLES!
7:25 AM
Thursday, February 07, 2008
some random babbling. dont bother to read lah ppl. (ahbengzxz and mats?) plus, its such an unearthly hour to blog now. yikes.
wed was cny celeb and it was wayy boring :/ (im still having weird thoughts of joining chi dance after seeing those amazing dancers from china) me and aimless partner as usual. met up with siti. and boy, we met so many ppl, too many ppl :// yeah, remy's such an asshole I.B.. he wasnt able to find for me my toe socks. LOL. -grins at siti and raihan-
at night, was bbq with the paternal side, at labrador park (: awesome posum, rly. stayed till two am. it was scary shit yo.
today, i finally got down to getting those toe socks! weeeeee~ also bought a book for myself. seems like ages since i last did that. - (random from here on. i think im being emo now. wth. plus i forgot my personal blog's pw. GAH) the frustration's rly building up now. now i understand why some ppl act ruthlessly when that happens. i rly dont like containing everything inside, if you ask me. always make me feel like bursting and running around school screaming and babbling utter nonsense. like a mad person. SIGH.
i hate expectations too. ppl expect me to be good all the time. they expect me to be tolerant, to be soft. and the expectation from ms chua, i rly dont like it. maybe not cause i dont have faith in myself. cause like the teachers said, its almost impposible to jump from a freaking f9 to a distinction in such a short time, no? listen, it was only the first test dude. what to do, im just gonna prolly fail my second test and disappoint her. im feeling rly angsty over this. what more, after i learnt that vaish dropped csp. shitz la. and also, after i learnt from mr tan that after next week, if we wanna drop any more subjs we still have to pay the fees for the o's. sucks. i wanna scream at the world.
its real love that you dont know about real love's playing now. ahhh that song makes me emo. im feeling stupid all over again. i think i care too much of what others think. plus, im having double boubts. im sorry im feeling this way, so confused all over again. nobody has got me this confused, rly, trust me on this one darling. my love for you will never end, you'll always be a part of me as long as time keeps on passing by, you'll always be my baby boy
lets go back to the old times; when love means nothing, but a simple date to the movies, holding hands together. strolling in the park, bathed in the sweetness of the moonlight packed sandwiches for supper, or maybe just a coffee at a nearby cafe. where a simple lip-to-lip kiss, could make you float in the air. secret calls at night, exchanging sweet goodnights. and when simple goodbyes were not so hard to get through.
okay, i dont think i can express myself well right now (at this time) study date tmr! am i glad. i.need.to.rant. ):
so you remy. you got me feeling all fucked up. again, feeling all fucked up about myself. & again, my insecurities all brought up. its not your fault. i've felt this way before alot of times. but. you caused this unexplainable gnawing feeling in me. rly, its one that i cant explain. clotting my mind like a disease. gahh. i've always thought that it'll be better if you hate me or smth. so you know, at least, i have like a reason to cry over smth. or ponder over smth. and vent out everything properly. that'll be nicer. shit, so emo. but still. i think i need a serious talk with you soon. (p.s. its a diff I.B. im talking bout here now)
HAHA, raihan and siti, now you know why. im sorry :/
"alaview"
-Pink&Black
APPLES!
8:01 AM
Tuesday, February 05, 2008
dearest lil sis showed me this. im slow. but haha, i think its god damn cute.
and i think this is rly cool shit. angklung ppl come watch this !!
and of course this too. one of mine and liy's current fav song (:
this is...aww! (to siti: i see wani yo! LOLL!)
&duh, i totally love this one <3 (kenangan terindah)
it'll be damn cool if we can play these songs for our performances doncha think :D
APPLES!
7:10 AM
apricot: terus melangkah melupakanmu lelah hati perhatikan sikapmu jalan pikiranmu buatku ragu
where'd you go? i miss you so.
on a brighter note, i got a red packet(seriously good money okay). yes, for early cny. NYAHAHA.
(im sorry im feeling overly insecure all over agn. im scared. im rly scared. im rly rly scared.)
-Pink&Black
APPLES!
6:01 AM
Monday, February 04, 2008
I'm all about you
I'm all about us
No, baby, you never have
To question my love
And every night
There's a new crowd
But it's always you
That I'm singing about
There is only one these words
Are going out to
Oh girl, I'm all about you
(old songs are always the best)
everyone knows i can have a rly bad temper. dont try me yo.
noone, lemme repeat this, NOONE have the rights to make fun of my dreams/push me around. do that, and i'll bite you. i rly will.
and the weird weather lately has been giving me weird side effects, like rly weird. like, my appetite jacked. dont wory folks. like i've said, its just the weird weather. okay, add not enough rest and too much worry on the list too.
im drowning in my own pool. ah-may-zing. i should have seen this coming, maybe hire a lifeguard or two.
save me, i'll love you forever...
and ever
and ever
and ever
and ever
and ever
and ever
and...
(ever)
Get well soon AMIRA <3
haha, sch's not the same w/o you. ):
and happy birthday little apricot (:
a year older, a step wiser ((:
-Pink&Black
When you told me that you loved me,
were those just words?
You can't tell me you don't need me,
and I know that hurts
'Cause I'm looking at your picture
'Cause it's all I've got
Maybe one day
You and me will have,
one more shot
APPLES!
6:23 AM
Saturday, February 02, 2008
im gonna make sure i learn how to shuffle by the end of this yr. probably right after my o's. it gets me so OOOH AHHH whenever i see ppl shuffling so nicely. but then again, im so clumsy.
i dont feel nice blogging here anymore. idk why, idk why. in case you dont know, i've secretly moved somewhere else. ask me and i might just tell you (:
Kan kujadikan kau Kenangan yang terindah dalam hidupku Namun takkan mudah bagiku Meninggalkan jejak hidupku - But I don't care what they say I'm in love with you They try to pull me away But they don't know the truth My heart's crippled by the vein That I keep on closing You cut me open and I Keep bleeding Keep, keep bleeding love I keep bleeding I keep, keep bleeding love Keep bleeding Keep, keep bleeding love You cut me open - &idk why also but these two songs have been on repeat. fond memories, always.
-Pink&Black
APPLES!
5:47 AM
Friday, February 01, 2008
the mellifluous melody of your voice; says in my dream, that there's no end to this.
"dont go away, please." "sorry, but i have to. cause i love you." its hard to say how much i like adore you. -Pink&Black
Church;
